


A Letter To My Best Friend (Zeroyalchaos)

by deanstrenchcoatangel



Series: Youtube One Shots [4]
Category: The Creatures (Youtube RPF), Video Blogging RPF, Youtube RPF
Genre: Best Friends, Coming Out, Friendship, Just Friends, bisexual!chilledchaos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 21:52:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7455210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deanstrenchcoatangel/pseuds/deanstrenchcoatangel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chilled writes a letter to Ze, telling him something he had always been afraid to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Letter To My Best Friend (Zeroyalchaos)

**Author's Note:**

> I need to preface this fic by saying that it isn't romantic zeroyalchaos, but friendship zeroyalchaos. This is OOC for Chilled. I'm just going to be honest. I'm pansexual, and wrote this fic as a letter to my best friend (hence the title) but made it into a zeroyalchaos fic because... Well, because I wanted to. I needed to work through some stuff, and used this fic. It's a bit of a mess, but then again, so am I. Without further ado, I hope ye enjoy.

Dear  ~~ Steven ~~ Ze, 

   I know it sounds stupid, but I have deliberated over who to address this to for like, five minutes. We’re Chilled and Ze, always have been, but Ze just seemed so informal for what this letter will entail. Steven seemed like the more formal choice for a serious, formal letter but then again, I haven’t called you Steven since we met in preschool. Okay, whatever. I’m getting off topic. The thing is, Steven-er, Ze, I need to tell you something. 

   But before I do, I need to just say that… Well… I’m scared to tell you the thing that I want to tell you. You’re my best friend. You have been for as long as I can remember. I can’t imagine living my life without you and it terrifies me that after I tell you this  _ thing _ … I might have to. 

   Okay. Here goes… Ze. I’m bisexual. I like girls, but I also like guys. Please don’t hate me. Before you crumple up this letter and throw it away and never talk to me again, just finish reading it. Okay? Deal? I hope you said deal. 

   If you are still reading, thanks. I’m glad that you’re at least going to finish reading this letter. The thing is, Ze, I’d kinda understand if you never spoke to me again. We grew up in the south. You’ve been to church every Sunday since you were a kid, and I’ve heard on more than one occasion that you have negative opinions on gays. Your whole family does. Which breaks my heart. 

   You and your family have always been there. I consider you a second family. And the thing is, I’m only, like, half-gay. But I’m scared that anything less than 100 percent straight isn’t going to cut it and that you’re going to ditch me. I’m scared that I’m going to lose my second family… And my best friend. 

   Or, possibly worse, you’re going to try to change me. You told me before that you asked your preacher to pray for me because I didn’t go to church. I can only imagine what you’ll do now that you know I’m bisexual. I’ve accepted that I’m bisexual, Ze. It took years, but I’m okay with that fact. It’s who I am.  _ Please _ don’t ask me to change. Don’t ask me to start going to church or… or… not date whoever I want or go to a pray-the-gay-away camps. I think that would somehow hurt worse than you never speaking to me again. I don’t want to lose you, Ze, but I don’t want you to try to change me.

   And, also, there’s another bad thing that could come from this, so let me just get it out of the way. I love you, Ze. But… I’m not  _ in love  _ with you. I have never been, and I probably will never be. You’re my best friend, my brother, and I’ve never been into you  _ like that _ . But I’m so afraid that you’re going to start analyzing our entire friendship… That you’ll… you’ll look back on all of our sleepovers or the times that we shared a bed or cuddled or  _ anything _ and you’ll think of them differently. That you’ll think I was creeping out on you or some other bullshit that’s not true. I don’t want you to think back and cheapen the moments that made us best friends. Even if you hate me from now on, leave them like they are. Don’t soil them. 

   I hope that you don’t hate me, Ze. I hope you can change your mind about lgbt+ people and accept. I hope that when you’re done reading this, you won’t run away. I hope that you won’t leave my house and never speak to me again. I hope that you won’t reimagine our friendship and that we can move on and be best friends forever and that nothing will change. I hope for a million different things that I could list here, but it would take forever and I hear your car pulling up outside. I started writing this while you were on your way to my house. I needed to tell you, but I knew that I wouldn’t be able to actually say these words. So I wrote them in a letter I’m planning on giving to you when you step foot in my room.  

   Well, that’s it, Ze. Everything I needed to say, laid out for easy access. Please don’t hate me. You’re my best friend and I love you. No homo. (too soon?) 

                                                                                                                                           Love,  ~~ Anthony ~~ Chilled

**Author's Note:**

> I hope that was okay? I take requests for fics, so if you have a pairing (with or without a scenario), leave me a comment or send me a message with it. :) Requests are always at the top of my list, so feel free to request away. I hope ye enjoyed. :)


End file.
